


Home-is-now-a-teeny-tiny-two-bedroomstuck

by clearwaterchild



Category: Homestuck
Genre: 2bed1bathstuck, Alternate Universe - College/University, Apartment Life, Collegestuck, F/M, Humanstuck, M/M, Relationship tags subject to change, how to get along with your roommates when they're intent on not getting along with you, or - Freeform, procrastinatefic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-10-02
Updated: 2012-10-27
Packaged: 2017-11-15 11:44:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/526942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clearwaterchild/pseuds/clearwaterchild
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In their second year of college, John, Dave, Karkat, and Sollux find themselves sharing a two-bedroom, one-bathroom apartment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Be John.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all! This is 2bed1bathstuck, a look into the lives of four college-aged guys sharing a tiny apartment. There will eventually be pairings, I'm just not sure which ones--likely EriSol, and maybe JohnDave or Johnkat if I really want to make things *that* awkward. I'm not sure I want to make things *that* awkward.

 

> Be John.

Your name is JOHN EGBERT, and you are EXCITED. You are excited because you are about to move into your new APARTMENT.

Last May, Dave approached you to ask if you wanted to get an apartment with him. But then it was kind of awkward because Karkat had _already_ asked you much much earlier, like all the way in February, and you’d said yes and gone apartment-hunting kind of not really, but you didn’t want to say no to Dave because if you did he’d do that thing where he pretended not to care but then pestered you endlessly at all hours of the night for weeks on end--yeah. So you said yes to Dave too and _kind of sort of_ forgot to tell him that you were also rooming with Karkat and _kind of sort of_ forgot to tell Karkat that you were adding Dave as an apartment-mate...

Yeah, they were both kind of pissed at you for doing that...hehe...heh...

But they got over it! And then you were looking at apartments, and you found this two-bedroom that you fell absolutely head-over-heels in love with, like this apartment was your Monica Potter, and you would go through all sorts of trials to come home to her...yeah that analogy didn’t really work, but you realized as you were leaving the building that you _had to have_ that apartment. And when you told this to Dave and Karkat, well, they agreed that it was a nice place...

But you were really going to have to find another roommate, because splitting $3000 worth of rent among three people was just _insane_. Especially for the unlucky bastard who got landed with the single, because there was no way he’d be paying the same amount as the two unlucky bastards who got stuck in a room with each other.

Anyway, you three decided--well, _you_ kind of decided and then Dave agreed with you and then, after much wheedling, Karkat begrudgingly accepted that if you two were going to be a pair of irredeemably fucking stupid shitsponges (his words not yours), he’d stick around for the ride--to sign the lease before you left for the summer and continue looking for apartment-mates over the break. You were kind of apprehensive about this, because you knew that _you_ didn’t know anybody--besides Dave and Karkat--who wasn’t living in the dorms again, and you knew that Dave, for all his talk, really didn’t know that many people period. So it was all on Karkat to find somebody.

Then it was mid-July and you were kind of freaking out because Karkat had told you _three weeks ago_ that he’d maybe found somebody and you hadn’t heard from him since, and you were beginning to wonder if you were actually going to have to deal with the three-people-two-bedrooms situation, both financially and emotionally--because Karkat and Dave were _not_ rooming together, but then who would you room with? If you chose Karkat, Dave would take it as a personal offense and guilt you about it _all year_ , and if you chose Dave, Karkat would gloat about having his own room but then would sometimes lock himself in there and not come out. So you were really, _really_ hoping Karkat would get back to you.

And get back to you he did! He called you on Skype some two weeks before your lease began. Turned out, Karkat had a friend who was in some crazy situation involving subletting or leases or assholes or some combination of the three. You weren’t quite able to understand what Karkat meant underneath all those layers of angry metaphor, especially when you couldn’t scroll up to reread the text, but bottom line: he’d found someone! Karkat gave you and Dave this guy’s Trollian handle--twinArmageddons, weird and a little bit overdramatically dumb, just like all Trollian handles--and his name. Sollux Captor. You were so relieved to finally have a fourth person that you immediately told Karkat to send Sollux down to sign the lease. Send him down? Up, east, west? You weren’t sure where Sollux was coming from--in fact, you hadn’t even met him, not even online--but if he was Karkat’s friend, you were sure he’d be a good roommate! Plus, him being close with Karkat totally relieved you of all hard decision-making duties. Sollux and Karkat would room together, and you’d room with Dave. Problem solved!

The two of you have talked a little since then. Sollux is pretty cool, you guess, kind of lame and maybe a bit of an asshole but also really equipped to deal with Karkat, which is good because you’re all right with him, but sometimes he has these freakouts and all you can do is stand there wringing your hands and jiggling your foot a little because you want to do something but you just don’t know what.

Anyway. Right now you’re in the passenger seat of your dad’s car, staring out the window as you get off the freeway. You’re finally back in the city, and it feels great! You’re going to have so much fun rooming with Karkat and Dave and Sollux. You’re already planning out all the amazing pranks you’re going to pull; they won’t be suspecting a thing and then BAM! Bucket of cold water to the head! Yessssssss.

Your dad finds a parking space about half a block away from the apartment building. Not bad. Before you do anything else, you jump out of the car and rush down the sidewalk, stopping in front of the entrance to stare up at your new HOME. You have so many plans for this place. So many hopes and dreams and ideas about the year to come, shared with your best bros...and Sollux. You may get along great, or you may get along horribly, but no matter what happens, you’re all STUCK with each other for the next twelve months! You giggle a little nervously at the thought of things turning out badly and push all your unfounded little fears to the back of your mind. You’re doing this man. You’re making this happen.

Your name is John Egbert, and this is going to be the BEST YEAR EVER.


	2. John: Be Karkat.

> John: Be Karkat

Your name is KARKAT VANTAS, and this is going to be the WORST YEAR EVER.

“ _I fucking hate IKEA!_ ” You’re standing in the very middle of your new room, in the maybe one square foot of clear space. The rest of the floor is covered with pieces of cheap wood and weird metal contraptions and bags of pegs and screws and fucking _Allen wrenches_ , because _someone_ had the bright idea to open _all_ the boxes of disassembled furniture at once and work on everything at the same time. That someone has since absconded with his dads to the nearest hardware store to pick up giant screws, since apparently the people they bought the cheap-as-fuck bunk bed from off Craigslist forgot to include some pieces essential to keeping the damned thing together. So now he’s gone and left you here to deal with everyone’s shit.

“Karkat, hon, calm down.” Your mom pokes her head in from the living room, where she and your older brother are assembling your desk. Kankri’s twenty-three and lives a few states away--not far enough, in your opinion--but, joy of joys, he insisted on coming back to “witness and counsel you in this important transition period of your life.” Whatever that means.

And, just as expected, he follows up your mom’s comment with, “Mother, please. Karkat is undoubtedly going through a lot of emotional distress during this time in his life. His increasing need for independence is clashing with his desire to remain a child, and he’s probably very conflicted regarding what he wants. I wouldn’t be surprised if his recent frequent outbursts are his way of expressing and dealing with these emotions. Karkat’s always been subpar at identifying his own emotional state. Could you pass me one of the wooden pegs and the mallet?”

Your mom hands the items over, frowning slightly. “Is he really? You didn’t react anywhere near the same way during your college years.”

“I was better adjusted than he is. Karkat’s very prone to teen angst.”

You roll your eyes and look at your mom, who makes a noncommittal noise and goes back to messing with the screw-nail things. You’ve never been able to figure out if she actually believes any of Kankri’s bullshit or if she’s just humoring him. You’re also not sure which is worse. And you’re _still aggravated dammit_! Your dresser and Sollux’s desk and dresser are _still_ all in pieces scattered around your room.

“Look who I found in the elevator!” your dad screeches from out in the hallway. Great. Just what you need: _more_ people with _more_ stuff.

“Hi Karkat!” John bursts through the door carrying an overstuffed duffel bag and a suitcase as though they were filled with air. “I just met your dad! He’s pretty cool.” He notices your mom and brother. “Hey! I’m John. I’m going to be in the other room.” He shifts the duffel bag and holds out a hand as first your mom then Kankri introduce themselves. “Wow, Karkat, you sure do have a lot of stuff there! Is it all yours?”

You grit your teeth. “No, some of it is my dumbass, stupid-head, absconding shitlicker of a roommate’s, and of course it was _his_ suggestion that I take all this stuff out, and then he just _left_ with no warning, and I reserve the right to be upset about that!”

“Sollux?” John’s face falls from a blandly happy expression into one that you can’t place. Confusion maybe? You don’t understand him at all sometimes, and it’s making you more frustrated. “Oh. Um. Anyway, I’ve gotta go help my dad get the rest of my stuff out of the van. See you in a bit!” John dumps his stuff onto the floor and runs off more quickly than he came in. You sigh, squeeze your eyes shut, and lean most of your weight on the unfinished bunk bed behind you. It gives a loud warning creak, but you don’t give a shit right now.

“Mother, do we have one more of those round plastic screwholder things?” you hear from the living room.

“No. Should we?”

“Yes.”

“Oh dear. This is--what do you say again, Kankri? Problematic? We’re going to have to head back to IKEA and tell them that our desk was missing one of its pieces.”

_AUGH_. Everything about today is awful. “I fucking hate,” you mumble, and then trail off because really, it doesn’t matter.


	3. Karkat: Be Sollux.

> Karkat: Be Sollux.

Your name is...do you really have to go through this again? You don’t have time for these bullshit introductions, since between your dads’ fussing and Karkat’s bitching and nothing going right today, you’re spending a lot of time troubleshooting.

You get back to the apartment after a trying experience at the hardware store to find that Karkat is nowhere to be found. His dad’s in the other room talking at someone else’s dad, and his stupid prick of a brother is fumbling around in the kitchen pretending to be doing something worthwhile, and _all of the stuff is still disassembled in your bedroom_. Like Karkat couldn’t have taken a few minutes to put just one thing together. You were gone for a good half hour. What did he do after you left, finger himself and cry?

Probably.

But despite the giant asshole today has been so far, you’re actually feeling pretty good. Willing and able to do things. So once the bunk bed is finished and secure, you get your dads to start putting together your dresser, and you start working on your desk. You figure you can leave Karkat’s dresser for him to deal with later. That’ll rile him up good.

_Whump_! A sudden noise shakes the entire apartment, and you nearly stab your desk-to-be with the flathead screwdriver you’re using.

“I think that’s the last of it!” calls a voice from the doorway. You grit your teeth and continue piecing together your desk, ignoring the conversation taking place in the other bedroom. If it’s not Karkat, you don’t care.

“Hi! You’re Sollux, right?” You look up, and some kid’s standing literally two inches away from you. “I’m John, we met online a couple times but never over Skype or anything. You’re a lot skinnier than I thought you’d be, from the way you talk.”

You blink. It takes you a couple seconds to come up with your reply: “Go away. I’m busy.”

Dad A looks up from his handful of drawer sliders and gives you a warning look. “Sollux.”

You glance back at John. “ _Please_ go away. I’m busy.”

John doesn’t go away. Instead, he gets even more in your face and leans down to examine your work. “Wow, you kind of suck at this.”

“Screw you.”

“Oh. That was kind of mean, huh.”

You raise your eyebrows. “You think?”

“Heh. Sorry dude.”

“We need more of these screw things,” Dad A says.

Dad 2 gets up and crosses the room. “Did these ones come out of that bag over there?”

“I don’t know. Why don’t you ask whoever laid it all out like this. Sollux--”

“I didn’t do it,” you respond immediately. “My dickmunching idiot of a best friend did.”

John goes still, like he’s noticing something for the first time. You follow his gaze. Oh. He must not have seen your dads when he came into the room to insult your lack of non-Minecraft building skills and tease you about your weight. You grab your Philips head and begin taking out the horridly lopsided screws.

There’s no sound for a while after that save for the quiet clicks of metal on metal and the grinding scrape of screws digging into wood. You figure John’s gone away, but when you look up again he’s still there, staring at your dads, and seemingly concentrating very hard on figuring something out.

_Oh_.

“Do you have a problem?” you ask.

“Wh- huh- no!” John steps back and looks at you. “I’m just.”

“You’re just standing there with your concentration face looking like you’re trying to figure out how to get two dicks in your mouth at once.”

John wrinkles his nose. “Gross, dude! Do you constantly talk about dicks or something?”

“He does,” Dad A and Dad 2 reply in unison. John glances over at them and fidgets. There’s a brief period of silence in which you want to strangle your new roommate.

Then Dad A steps forward and offers a hand. “I’m Pol, and this is my partner, Clubs. We’re Sollux’s parents.”

“Oh! Nice to meet you. I’m John.” John takes the proffered hand, and then holds out his hand to Dad 2. “So you guys _are_ gay, then.”

Okay, that’s it. You stand up, grab John by the back of his shirt, and drag him all the way out of the apartment and into the hall.

“What’s wrong with you?” you hiss. “Do you think there’s something _wrong_ with my dads?”

“Uhh...” John takes a breath.


	4. Sollux: Be Dave

> Sollux: Be Dave. (Post Thursday 10/11)

Your name is DAVE STRIDER, and you are BORED AS SHIT.

_THE GRAND CANYON STATE WELCOMES YOU_ , reads the sign your truck just passed. The sun bears down on you, mercilessly hot, and the air is dry and stagnant. Heat waves distort your vision and make your head swim, and you think maybe you’re going insane. There’s nothing but flat desert in all directions, the sky is alarmingly cloudless, and you and Bro have been the only ones on the road for miles. Shit’s starting to freak you out.

You look at the speedometer. Bro’s not even going speed limit, what the hell. There’s nothing he could possibly run into save for the very occasional big rig, and there’s definitely nothing to look at. Aw hell, he’s probably doing it just to fuck with you. You wanna go back to college Dave? You wanna go see all your friends again Dave? Well too bad, ‘cause Bro’s here to make it as terrible and difficult as possible. Just like always.

Bro quickly glances at you out of the corner of his eye. He’s been doing that the entire trip, and it’s starting to get on your nerves.

“Bro, could we pick up the pace?”

He acts like he doesn’t hear you. So it’s official: he’s trying to piss you off. You huff and pull your headphones from around your neck over your ears. If Bro’s gonna ignore you, you’re sure as hell gonna ignore him. You tell your iPhone to shuffle through all the songs on it and sit back, closing your eyes.

A very familiar piano riff hits your ears, backed by a very familiar beat. It’s one of your mixes from five, maybe six years ago. You’re not sure if you want to smile at the nostalgia or grimace at the terrible quality.

You’ve got to tell John about this.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 13:36 --

TG: oh man major nostalgia overload over here

TG: you remember back when we were like 13 and you sent me a bunch of your compositions so i could use em to make mixes

TG: my iphone just started playing one of them

TG: the mixes i mean

EB: oh wow dave that is so cool!

EB: not. it’s actually really lame.

TG: whoa dude whats got your panties in a twist

TG: also no

TG: its cool

TG: like objectively

EB: dave, all the music that i composed when i was 13 was shit.

EB: like, objectively.

EB: and i don’t want to talk about it.

EB: just.

EB: tell me you’ll be here soon.

TG: no can do

TG: we just crossed into arizona and bros driving like an old lady

EB: ugh. so tell him to drive faster.

TG: tried that but its one of his tests or something

TG: how long can i bug the shit out of dave before he snaps

EB: your brother is a giant piece of shit.

TG: wow youre definitely on your period

TG: and even if we drove like hell we still couldnt get up there til tomorrow

TG: were gonna have to stop and sleep somewhere

EB: there are two of you aren’t there.

EB: one of you drives, and the other sleeps.

TG: dude john im not getting there today

TG: we drove all night

TG: were gonna stop somewhere in a couple hours to sleep

TG: drive all night again

TG: and get there tomorrow afternoon or evening or something

EB: bluuuhhhhh. fiiiiine.

EB: see you whenever i guess.

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 13:50 --

This is basically his equivalent of hanging up on you. Whatever. You don’t care what crawled up his ass, and you’re damn glad you don’t have to be around for him to bitch at you in person.

You pause the song and shove your phone in your pocket. 

“Where are we stopping?” you ask Bro after a long period of silence.

“Phoenix or thereabouts.”

“How long’ll that take?”

“A while.”

You slump. It’s hot and dry and the world is made of dirt-sand and no matter how many times you make this trip you will never get used to the hours and hours and hours of blandly-colored nothing.

Bro glances at you again. This time, his gaze lingers.

“Something on my face?”

“Just checkin’ up on you, s’all.”

You roll your eyes. “Don’t see what there is to check up on. I didn’t get any different in the five minutes since you last ‘checked up’ on me.”

“Oh, quit bein’ a little shit.”

You do not quit being a little shit. “I’m not little anymore, Bro,” you say, and even though you’re not stupid, you figured out years ago that the reason Bro can read you like an open book is because you pretty much are one, you still try to hide that you’re getting ticked off.

“Fine. Quit being a gigantic shit.”

You could respond, but there’d be no point. You can read Bro nearly as easily as he can read you; the exchange is over. He’ll keep glancing over at you every so often to make sure you’re not choking on your own spit, and he’ll do it consciously now, just to watch your cute attempts at hiding your anger.

“You wanna drive?” he asks.

“No.”

“All right then.”

You adjust your headphones and turn your music back on.


	5. John: Sulk.

> John: Sulk.

 

EB: bluuuhhhhh. fiiiiine.

EB: see you whenever i guess.

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 13:50 --

You toss your phone onto your desk and hide your face in the pile of clothes you’re supposed to be unpacking from your suitcase. Today is not going the way you wanted.

Sollux is turning out to be a lot more of an asshole than he came across as in your pesterlogs. Which is saying something, because Sollux comes across as a pretty big asshole. You _swore_ to him that you weren’t thinking anything bad about his dads. And you _weren’t_! You noticed them, and you immediately assumed they were a gay couple and wanted to introduce yourself. But then you thought, what if they weren’t a gay couple? Would they be insulted that you thought they were? Would they be insulted if you _asked_? You knew you yourself wouldn’t get mad at anybody who mistook you for gay--Karkat could attest to that--but you had no idea how other people would react. So you were trying to figure out which man to introduce yourself to, and you were looking to see if either looked like Sollux. 

That was when Sollux told you you looked like you wanted a dick in your mouth. Rude. And yeah, okay, your response to his dads’ introduction was a little bad, but you were so excited about being _right_ that it just...slipped out.

And you _tried_ to explain this to Sollux, but he was too busy yelling at you to listen to anything you had to say. You get that the whole “having two dads” thing must get to be kind of a sore spot after years of getting shit for it, but he didn’t have to make assumptions.

Bottom line: Sollux Captor has singlehandedly turned your great day into a bad day.

And now Dave isn’t going to be here, so it’s even worse!

“ _Augh_ ,” you groan into what’s probably a pile of underwear. You lift your head. Yup. You’ve been sitting on the floor for five minutes with your face buried in a heap of your boxer briefs.

“Everything all right in here, son?” Your dad knocks lightly on the open door and comes in. “I heard you and the other boy outside. Are you--”

“I’m fine, Dad. Dave can’t make it today.”

He leans down and sits cross-legged beside you. “Well, it’s a good thing we brought the bunk bed frame then.” You glare. “All right, all right, don’t give me that look. I’m sorry you won’t get to see your friend today. But that’s no reason to neglect your roommate-ly duties of unpacking and setting up. In fact, I think Dave might appreciate it if he arrives and has a clear space to assemble his furniture.” Your dad gestures vaguely toward the door separating your room from the living room. “It makes for a stressful environment when everyone’s starting the adjusting process at the same time. So c’mon son, get up and let’s get the dresser put together!”

You sigh, but you stand up and help your dad open the two boxes that hold the pieces of your dresser. You figure he’s right; there’s no sense in getting all mad about things. You’re all a little on-edge about coming back to school, first impressions are hardly ever right, and it should take a hell of a lot more than some stupid misunderstanding to get _you_ down!

By the time Karkat comes back from IKEA, you’re back to normal. And good thing, too, because you’ve got guests.

“Hi efurryone!” A girl who’s even shorter than Karkat pokes her head through the gap between Karkat’s arm and the door frame. “I’m Nepeta. I live across the hall in 615, and I was just heading out to hunt down some food when I ran into Karkitty here!” She grins. Either she’s wearing fake fangs, or she just has really sharp canine teeth. You don’t want a repeat of the Sollux thing, so you don’t stare and try to find out which option it is. You don’t ask either.

Instead you mirror her grin, hold out your hand, and say, “Hi Nepeta, I’m John! It’s nice to meet you. I like your hat.”

Nepeta giggles--it’s a high-pitched, slightly disturbing sound--and tugs at the bottom of her furry cat-eared hat. “Thanks, a friend of mine made it for me after a hunting trip. It’s rabbit fur, so it’s a little warm to be wearing in August, but the tempurrature’s not that bad out here and besides, I love it too much!”

“Hunting...trip? You mean like hunting real animals?” You look at Nepeta. She doesn’t look like someone who’d go on hunting trips. At least, not the way you thought someone like that would look. You always imagined hunters to be big burly white men with lots of facial hair and gruff voices who lived out in the woods and raised animals or something. Nepeta can’t possibly be someone who hunts, you decide. You’ve misunderstood. She must be talking about her friend’s hunting trip, that he went on.

“Oh nooooo, it’s not what you think!” Nepeta snaps you back to the present. She looks mortified and a little embarrassed maybe, probably because she thinks you haven’t already figured out the misunderstanding. You give her a reassuring smile. “We didn’t kill the rabbits just for their fur. I hunt for food, not sport!”

That takes a few seconds to sink in. While your brain is working its hardest to process the information you’ve just been given, your body is frozen in place.

“Egbert why the hell are you just standing there grinning like some dumbass?”

“Wha-? Oh. Um. Sorry. I just, I mean, wow.” You’re still not sure how to react. “You just don’t look like some backwoods hick or anything, I never would have guessed.”

“ _John_ ,” Karkat growls under his breath, and practically shoves Nepeta aside to grab your arm and dig his sharp nails into your skin. “One of these days you _really_ need to learn how to get a filter, because you have no fucking tact at all, do you?”

You look at Nepeta, who just shrugs. “I get that a lot, actually,” she says. “I don’t mind. But thanks for sticking up for me, Karkitty! Not many people do.”

Karkat lets go of your arm and sputters for a few seconds. Finally, he gets out, “Well, you’re a human being, it’s just common fucking decency. And don’t call me Karkitty.”

“Hee hee!”

Nobody really knows what to say after that, so the three of you end up awkwardly crowding the doorway and not talking and not looking at each other.

“Well...it was nice meeting you two!” Nepeta extracts herself from the triangle of awkwardness. “I’ve got a mew things to take care of, so I’ll see you late--”

“ _The great Dragonyyd Legislacerator, Tealmouth, strides full of purpose up to the two-mouthed feline_!” You and Karkat both jump and look around for the new voice. Nepeta gives a sharp-toothed smile.

“ _The skilled huntress Arsenicat looks up from her most recent kill and regards Tealmouth with an excited stare. She hasn’t seen her cavemate all day_!”

A devious cackle. “ _Tealmouth is amused at Arsenicat’s remark. She herself has_ never _seen her cavemate_.” Karkat moves away from the door and faces the hall so you can both get a good look at the newcomer. The first thing you see is a wide-mouthed, toothy grin, and whoa, you thought _Nepeta_ had sharp teeth. This girl has a shark smile, and it’s honestly kind of creeping you out, especially with her pointy frame and long cane and the loud colors she’s wearing and the fact that you can’t see her eyes. It’s like everything about her is screaming, _Watch out! I’m dangerous!_

You look to Karkat to see if he’s thinking the same thing as you. He’s...not thinking the same thing as you.

Nepeta pouts. “Oh! I’m sorry, Terezi, did I say something mean again? I didn’t mean to...”

Shark-girl--Terezi, you guess--snickers. “Relax, roomie, I’m only pretending to be offended for personal humor. This is our second year living together and I _still_ have to explain this? Every time?” She sighs. “So what juicy prey have you dragged in this time?”

“Right!” Nepeta perks up again. “Some new people are moving into 612 today, and I decided to come say hi. This is Karkat, on the right, and John, on the left. Guys, this is my roommate, Terezi.”

“Pleasure to meet you,” Terezi leers.

“Good to meet you too.” You offer your hand. There’s a silence. Nepeta and Karkat look a little uncomfortable. Terezi just looks pleased.

“He’s holding his hand out, isn’t he.”

“Mm-hm.”

All of a sudden it clicks that _she’s blind, of course she can’t see your hand, you moron!_ “Oh, uh, sorry.” You pull your hand back and look away. God, you’re just being thoughtlessly offensive to everyone today, aren’t you? Maybe you should just crawl under your bed and not come out until you’re done being dumb. That would be nice. Maybe you’ll be better by the time Dave gets here. You were kind of a jerk to him earlier, so maybe you should, like, apologize or something. Or would that be weird? You don’t know.

You bring yourself out of your head and find that you have no idea what’s going on. Nepeta’s gone, Terezi’s laughing maniacally, and Karkat’s scowling so hard his eyebrows have become a unibrow. The conversation has moved on, and you’re getting the distinct feeling that you’re not included in it.

“Okay, well I’m gonna go unpack and do...stuff. It was nice meeting you TerezitellNepetaitwasnicemeetinghertooseeyouroundokaybye!”

You abscond.


End file.
